Mark: Anddddd open your eyes.
Co-Owner: Holy shit.
Mark: Pretty cool, right?
Co-Owner: That is truly terrifying.
Mark: Terrifyingly awesome.
Co-Owner: No, not awesome. We’re supposed to be making a mini-golf fun center that’s fun for the whole family. This is not what I would call family fun.
Mark: Clowns are fun!
Co-Owner: If rape dressed as a clown, it would dress like this.
Mark: Oh c’mon, kids are going to love this. I made the tongue a ramp. That’s super fun.
Co-Owner: Mark, his hat is covered in skulls and you gave him eyes that, and I’m being totally honest, scare the shit out of me.
Mark: If you don’t like this, then you’re definitely not going to like Hole 14.
Co-Owner: Why?
Mark: Well, it’s inspired by A Clockwork Orange.
Owner 1: The Putting Edge Fun Center is open for business!
Owner 2: People are going to have so much fun here!
Owner 1: Hey, that’s why it’s the FUN Center. It’s the Center for FUN.
They both high five and scream yeah.
Owner 2: And it’s the only fun center that has glow-in-the-dark mini golf and an arcade and…
Owner 1: A name that is also a pun on the the 1992 movie The Cutting Edge!
Owner 2: The world’s finest comedy about an ill-tempered Olympic ice skater who teams up with a hockey player. A hockey player!
Owner 1: Live, laugh, play mother fuckers!
Owner 2: Everyone is going to get this reference!
Owner 1: We’re having so much fun!
Owner 2: That’s why we have people jumping on our business card!
Owner 1: Because when people have fun, they jump!
They both jump and high five in mid air. A customer walks in.
Customer: Excuse me, I just walked any noticed you guys opened. The Putting Edge, I love it!
Owner 1: Thank you!
Customer: So you have golf and ice skating?
Owner 2: Uh, just golf.
Customer: Oh. Ok then.
The customer exits.
Owner 1: This is all your fault.
Owner 2: I’m never going to jump again.
