Boss:  Hey, I wanted to talk to you about your handicap placards for the new light rail? Employee:  Hot shit, right? Boss:  Please don’t curse in the office. Employee:  Oh yeah, sorry.  Boss:  Now The upper left… Employee:  Is for pregnant women. Boss:  Why does she have preying-mantis-hook-hands? Employee:  She was a flipper baby. It’s a miracle she even got pregnant. Boss:  We really need you to stop taking creative liberties with these designs. Now the upper right… Employee:  Is for women with small children. Boss:  Yeah, small children. That child is huge. Employee:  He has gigantism. It’s really sad. Boss:  Can you just draw what we ask you to draw? Now the lower left… Employee:  Is for blind people. Boss:  Then why does he look like a member of Hitler’s SS Elite Guard? Employee:  He was, but he was blinded by a flash grenade.  Boss:  Stop drawing Nazi’s! I’m not going to tell you again. Now the lower right… Employee:  Is an old man. Boss:  He looks like an old repentant miner. Employee:  What, you don’t want to give old repentant miners a seat? Their hearts are heavy with regret. Boss:  I really dislike you.

Boss:  Hey, I wanted to talk to you about your handicap placards for the new light rail?

Employee:  Hot shit, right?

Boss:  Please don’t curse in the office.

Employee:  Oh yeah, sorry. 

Boss:  Now The upper left…

Employee:  Is for pregnant women.

Boss:  Why does she have preying-mantis-hook-hands?

Employee:  She was a flipper baby. It’s a miracle she even got pregnant.

Boss:  We really need you to stop taking creative liberties with these designs. Now the upper right…

Employee:  Is for women with small children.

Boss:  Yeah, small children. That child is huge.

Employee:  He has gigantism. It’s really sad.

Boss:  Can you just draw what we ask you to draw? Now the lower left…

Employee:  Is for blind people.

Boss:  Then why does he look like a member of Hitler’s SS Elite Guard?

Employee:  He was, but he was blinded by a flash grenade. 

Boss:  Stop drawing Nazi’s! I’m not going to tell you again. Now the lower right…

Employee:  Is an old man.

Boss:  He looks like an old repentant miner.

Employee:  What, you don’t want to give old repentant miners a seat? Their hearts are heavy with regret.

Boss:  I really dislike you.

11 Notes

  1. teamtigerawesome reblogged this from concoctedconversations and added:
    always worth a read.
  2. ridiculously-dilettantish reblogged this from concoctedconversations
  3. concoctedconversations posted this