Stan: Gimme a pen.
Dan: Why?
Stan: Just gimme a pen already.
Dan gives Stan a pan. Stan writes on the flyer.
Stan: That’ll show ‘em.
Dan: That’ll show ‘em what exactly?
Stan: That it’s not holiday season. It’s the Christmas season.
Dan: Ohhh, I forgot that when you say “Happy Holidays”, what you’re really saying is “Fuck Jesus.”
Stan: I’m not saying “Happy Holidays” when everybody knows the holiday everyone is talking about is Christmas.
Dan: Everyone except for the Jews.
Stan: Forget Hanukkah, it sucks. Ask any Jew. They only play it up to compete with Christmas. And guess what? They lose every year.
Dan: I didn’t realize it was a competition.
Stan: Don’t even get me started on Kwanza. It sounds like a motorcycle. I hurt my leg on a motorcycle once, so I mean… there’s that. Plus I don’t know one black person who celebrates it.
Dan: You don’t know any black people.
Stan: Yes I do!
Stan thinks for a moment.
Stan: Leo! I know Leo!
Dan: He’s black? I thought he was just really tan.
Stan: Either way, I’m going to wish him a “Merry Christmas” when I see him.
Dan: The funny thing is you don’t even go to church anymore.
Stan: Shutup. Let me have this.
10 Notes
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